Braedon had a zest for life.
He wasn't afraid to dream big from a young age.
His love for video sparked a love for history and he dreamed of seeing the world. Scotland, Italy, Spain; he was fascinated by history and wanted to walk through history.
He dreamed of becoming a professional gaming YouTuber and had even started his first channel.
He asked me if I'd help him figure it out and despite not knowing much about YouTube I said yes, without hesitation.
We can figure it out. There's definitely some courses out there that would help, I told him and he was tickled pink. He died not long after that conversation though.
Bucket Lists & Guilt
He had bucket lists and goals and wasn't afraid to think BIG for his life. He was planning everything from travel to seeing a Stanley Cup game, the Olympics, concerts, swimming with the sharks and so much more. Looking back now I wonder if somehow his tiny but mighty soul knew his stint here on earth would be shorter than most.
Early on after he passed though I wondered how I would live the rest of my life without him. With that fiery pain burning inside me and the longing that ached down into the marrow of my bones. Thinking of all the things he'd never get to do or experience was a hellfire I could have never imagined.
If something made me laugh or experience even a moment of joy the guilt would claw at my throat and heart and make me feel sick to my stomach. What kind of mother would smile when her child is dead? What did that say about me? I wondered. How could I just carry on when he was gone? Those are the kinds of thoughts that plagued my mind and threatened my future.
When I felt like I was dying though. When life felt impossible I found his list. It was as if Braedon was reaching out across space and time reminding me to be brave, urging me not to waste what had been taken from him and daring me to fully experience all the beauty and wonderment this life has to offer.
New Grief Mindset
That’s when it dawned on me. If I spent my time feeling guilty for carrying I’d be wasting what had been taken from him. The gift of life and time. The opportunity to wake up and chase my boldest and wildest aspirations; to live my dreams. I would not take this life for granted; not after seeing how fragile life really is.
I had no idea how and I’m still not entirely sure but I decided that day I would complete his list and I’d make my own too. That’s how I’d honour him; by honouring my own life and by taking the steps he never got to take.
That’s how Braedon reached out and inspired my 100 Brave Things Project from beyond this world. That’s why I show up here and bare my soul even when it feels like nobody hears me.
It’s part of my big dream to someday become a New Times Bestselling author. Part of my dream to make a difference in the world. And part of an even bigger dream to help others see and dream beyond what seems possible.
Dreaming big, just like Braedon did, keeps our hearts connected and our bond strong. It allows me to carry a piece of him with me everywhere I go. It helps me stay open to not only living but living large and healing too and without feeling guilty or like a bad mom.
“Be the things you loved most about the people who are gone.”
XO Tiffany
In the face of extreme adversity Tiffany started giving back to raise a rainbow to her son Braedon's memory.
After finding his bucket list she committed to completing it and launched her 100 BRAVE Things Project in his memory.
When life felt meaningless she found his list and started to live with more purpose and intention than she ever had before.
Now she’s committed to empowering others to believe in radical possibility.
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